Conan the Barbarian #100 - Video Review by ComicBook.beer

Welcome back to ComicBook.beer for your daily comic book mission where I'm turning the daily series into video. So even though I did an audio version of this, I think it's time that we take a look at the video of what this thing actually looks like. One of the biggest, most famous, most important Conan the Barbarian issues of all. Issue number 100, a double-sized dynamic issue. Death on the Black Coast.

Where we really can't tell from the cover, but is Conan screaming in pain that he's lost his longtime girlfriend, Belit, or that he's screaming with joy that he's now free to return to a life of boozing and wenching?

What's interesting here is that Conan has been with Belit, who just appeared in only one Robert E. Howard story. I think it was only one. Queen of the Black Coast. He's been with the character since issue 58.

This is from January of 1975 and this one is from July of 1979. So that's quite a time and Conan with a girlfriend is like James Bond with a wife. Does it work? Some people think so, some people don't. Actually there's a really interesting letters section in one of the next couple Conan issues where it's like a 50-50 split. And I would agree. I think she was a good character. Maybe in the series for a little bit too long.

Time to get rid of her by issue number 100 and it's a great issue. Actually one of the best ones and I'll show you why in a moment. Quick correction here. January of 1976. I was alive when this issue came out even though it says '75. January 1976. Though I do take issue with this statement. "At last the fiery beginning of the longest-awaited, most requested Conan epic ever." No, not entirely true. I have requested Conan vs Robocop numerous times and they have still not delivered.

For starters, like I mentioned in the audio version here, I'm going to show you just how incredible the Battlestar Galactica t-shirt collection is from 1979. I would wear every single one of these and if there's any way I can just go back in time and mail this in and buy them. Oh, how much are these? $4.99 each. That's a deal for t-shirts these days. What are they, 30 bucks now? Five bucks for a t-shirt? Yes, please.

So here's the creative team. You get the A team of Conan creators, of course. Roy Thomas, John Buscema and Ernie Chan. Joe Rosen lettering and George Roussos is one of the big-time colorists from back in the day based on the story Queen of the Black Coast by Robert E. Howard, most famous Robert E. Howard Conan stories.

Belit has established herself as one of the main characters in the Conan the Barbarian universe by this point and she's likable but at the same time not that likable. She's brave, she's strong, cool, but she's also needy and always jealous and greedy and her greed is what gets the best of her in the end and I think they've really been hyping that up over the last couple issues.

She's Queen of the Tides, or she's the captain of the Tigress, which is a boat. She sails in the south and she robs other vessels. Conan joined her all the way back in this issue. And they've been sailing together, plundering, going on adventures, fighting monsters. And she's just been constantly getting jealous anytime Conan looks at anything, whether it's alive, undead, a monster, living, has blue hair, shoots fire, doesn't matter. She gets jealous.

Personally, I get jealous whenever I see a Hostess fruit pies ad. And this is one of my favorites. I love it when they combine it with the big-time comic book characters like the Thing down here at the end. This is better than fighting. "You get a big delight in every bite of Hostess fruit pies." I mentioned this before, but here I'll show you. The off-brand Jaws back here. The peach-flavored fruit pie. I've never seen one of those in real life. I kind of want one. Maybe not a 1979 one, but.

Here's a great shot of Conan the Barbarian. John Buscema's mastery of anatomy and action and illustration. And I think he really brought his... I mean, John Buscema was amazing. In general, everything he did was incredible. But I think he really pulled out all the stops for this particular issue. And compared to some of the other Conans from this period, there's always great action and sword fighting and fighting monsters and whatnot. But look at the background details on everything.

I think you really need to see this. That's why I'm moving the Daily Comic Book Mission series to video. I see you watching the videos. I like making the videos. It's actually a little more fun to talk about the ads and stuff in video because you really need to just... As somebody from the 70s, I think you really need to see these just to bring it back home how much more awesome everything was back then. Peach fruit pies. Rogers. Look at that. So much fun. Comic conventions. When? I missed them. Damn.

Now for you longtime Conan fans, longtime literary Conan fans who read the stories, this is one of the rare Conan issues where it's like one-to-one. I mean, this is very similar to the Robert E. Howard story. And again, look at the detail that Buscema put into this. They sail the Tigress down this river.

I forget exactly what it's called, but it basically translates to the river you're all going to die horribly on. And Belit's like, "But there's treasure at the end of this river." And Conan's like, "Yeah, I just don't think this is a great idea." But she outranks them, so they do it anyway. And Conan typically is pretty compliant when it comes to Belit for some reason. Well, actually we know the reason, but never mind.

So they're sailing down the river and they reach this city, this fabled city. You see this monster fly away in the distance and one of their crew members is eating in the water while they're sailing by this monster and they're like, "Yeah, it's cool, whatever." And the water, by the way, is poisoned so they can't drink it. That's an important plot point.

And here's an interesting part of the story where we see Belit really amps up her greed for this issue because she wants to move this thing and she thinks there's treasure. It's always all about treasure for Belit. We don't really know what she spends her money on. Certainly not clothing.

But they want to move this thing and then she realizes that it's probably dangerous. So she calls Conan away, kills a bunch of her crew members. Conan's like, "Wow, that's pretty cold even for her." So she's clearly going a little berserk by this point, I think.

In part because this is actually how she was written in the original story. And also I think it's just time to get rid of the character and move on. So this is more of her original personality here.

And those of you who read the book know she discovers this blood-colored jewel necklace and she's wearing it. And in the end, I'll give it away because we know she dies, because Conan is screaming in joy or pain that she's dead. But she basically ends up being hung by the necklace. It kills her.

Howard's writing is pretty awesome. So if you haven't read the original stories, these are typically loosely based on them, but this one really captures it and adds a lot of visual flair. I love it when Buscema draws these wild 1970s Conan issues where Conan is tripping on LSD and stuff. We get a look at these.

This city. Conan walks into a black lotus flower and he's knocked down because he normally would kill somebody, but because he's Conan and his name is literally on the cover of the book, he doesn't die. He goes on this space trip where he sees these monsters from thousands of years earlier who built this city before man, before the oceans rose or whatever rose before the cataclysm which made the river spill over its banks and they all drank from the river and turned into these monsters.

That's what they looked like before, like the SilverHawks or something. They looked like a 1980s TV show. So then they all turned into these monsters and maybe there's one of them left.

So after we all admire an ad for Star Wars figures back when these were brand new, you could get a collector's case. $2.99. There's the Gonk Droid. I just fed one of them to the shark in the most recent Classic Game Room video. Hopefully you've been checking that out.

Is that a Battlestar Galactica pen? Is that a Cylon? I think I missed that last time. Yes, Cylon pen. I really need to go back to the 70s and stay there. I've mentioned this before.

Anyway, Conan wakes up, finds everybody either dead or driven crazy. And we don't really know why. But we find out pretty quickly that this whole thing is really just cursed. These monsters, any men or humans who have ventured to this village or town since this cataclysm, they all end up falling asleep and they all wake up as hyenas.

There's Belit, who's dead. And once again, you can just see the look on his face like, "Finally. I can go and look for brothels again." Or he's sad. We don't know. I think he's maybe sad.

Nobody leaves it sad. If you look at this closely, every single one of these panels has background detail. Just imagine the amount of effort that Buscema put into drawing this. They get the water supplies poisoned and that's why they have to go into the jungle. He does all the detail work on the jungle. And this issue's faded over the years, but I can only imagine these colors really popped when this was new.

By Crom, it's time for a flagon of ale! Which I don't have this morning, sadly.

I'll pour one out for Belit later. So Conan ends up fighting these monsters and the story is a little bit disjointed. It's like the main character dies halfway through and the rest of it's just one giant battle scene, but it's just fabulous. It's a great issue and if you liked the Belit character after three years or whatever, maybe you're sad that she's gone. You're tired of her after three years, well, you know.

It's time for Conan to move on, which he does in like the next day. Actually that's not entirely true. It takes him a few issues to really start boozing and wenching again, but don't worry, he returns to form. Doesn't take him very long.

Fact of anything, when you read the King Conan series, he treated Belit a lot better than he treats his wife when he's a king. I'll point that out later when I start doing some more videos on the King Conan books. He treated her like dirt. I think he liked Belit more than his wife.

Dear viewers, listeners, take it back to the 70s when Pete Rose hawked just about everything. Conan flame broils his girlfriend. They advocated buying your kids firearms and movie projectors showed whatever kind of movie you wanted to show on it, I guess.

Conan the Barbarian issue number 100, one of the best, most important Conan issues. I think the whole creative team brought their A game to give Belit a fond farewell.

Queen of the Black Coast. Death on the Black Coast. Conan is free once again to do what Conan does best. Kill things while being drunk and making his way to the next brothel.

Thanks to the Comics Code, who really ruined everything, we can't see what kind of movies you would actually show on this projector. It shows both color and black and white film. What a miracle of 1970s technology. Comes with a full-hooded theater screen and three-dimensional thrills to your viewing. 3D stereo specs makes flat ordinary movies seem so lifelike that you'll want to reach out and touch them.

You know, I'm just gonna quit today while I'm ahead.